i no longer count the days.

hours, maybe.
minutes- sometimes.
years, absolutely.
but not days, not anymore.

i no longer pick up chips,
birthday cakes.
a day is a day

(is a day)

but one day at a time
means they tend to blur together-
as maybe they should.

years, though,
we all measure those,
especially new ones.

and so-
today i’m 5 years sober.
jan 1, 2021.

we’re all hoping for better and normally
i’d celebrate with taco bell
but i suppose
i’m honestly just grateful
to have survived another year
(especially 2020)
and to have done it
without falling into a bottle.

it might have occurred to me once or twice.
If i’m counting the hours,
that’s 43,800.
in minutes: 2,678,000.

all written out like that,
it almost seems like
it’s really something.
a huge accomplishment.

but when i was counting the days,
24 hours
was a huge accomplishment.
48 hours.
a week.
a month.

any addict getting sober is a miracle, to be sure.
and i’m a kindergartener in sobriety still
but one thing’s for sure:

i’m thankful
to no longer count the days.