Relationships,
For all their good intentions,
Will leave you wanting, sometimes.
Ultimately,
They will drain you in some unavoidable way
Like the rip tide at the beach-
You can’t see it
Until it pulls you under.
And love is like that.
So you try to stand guard,
Let others
Know where you are.
Try not to venture past the net.
But it’s so tempting,
And try as you might,
You just can’t stop yourself.
And sometimes you drown.
That beautiful thing
Only looked perfect from far away.
What you thought was a rock,
Some semblance of strength,
Was actually just a clump
Of seaweed and dead fishes
And bird shit
But it took you a while to notice
Because the sun was in your eyes.
And you wasted your time.
So you swim back to shore.
Dry out, get a tan,
Get your shit together,
And try again.
And maybe once you find what you’re looking for.
He is perfect
And he understands you
And he breaks your heart.
You get some excuse about fairness
And distance
And he’s gone,
In a flash,
And you never really got anything
You could hold onto.
Nothing to sink your teeth into.
Just a flash of a half-promise of a hope
Of happiness.
And, again, you work on your tan.
Get hot,
Go back out.
This next one is less shark-like,
Less slippery.
He’s a little nicer,
He has kind eyes.
He’s a man, you think,
A smart one.
He reads, and he adores you,
But he’s hanging on a little too tight
And you begin to suffocate.
You don’t want children,
And you want the spark and the chase
And now you’re used to being alone
And you can’t breathe.
You smother it, quickly,
But not fast enough,
And you’ve hurt this one.
Let him suffer.
But what choice did you have?
And back you go,
But maybe this time,
You watch the sunset.
You know more now,
You can be choosier,
Aloof,
Distant.
That’s the real trick.
It’s not a secret,
But inside your head
Can be a fucking scary place
Cleaning out cobwebs
And killing spiders
And scaring ghosts away.
And life is better at the beach, anyway,
Even by yourself.
