I once had a friend
With an interesting opinion
On soul mates.
Some people believe they don’t exist.
That there is not one single human
For every other human.
That if there was,
You might never meet that person
And then you’d have to settle
Or live your life knowing
That someone else
Is married to your significant other.
Some people believe
That there is only one person for everyone.
Religious people sometimes believe
That a higher power sent their spouse to them.
Maybe some of them
Simply believe in destiny,
Serendipity,
Or the whole
‘You’ll find love when you least expect it’
Thing.
But this friend,
He believed that everyone has a bunch of soul mates.
That he had actually loved
Each and every girl/woman he’d dated
And that they’d all left a lasting impression on his life,
And connected in some irreversible and profound way.
Which is fine,
And sort of romantic in a
You’re-not-all-that-important-or-special
Kind of way.
But I never really liked the idea of it.
It didn’t sound right to me.
It almost seemed like
He was saying he was such a magnetic person
That he could develop that close of a bond with everyone
And thought he was friends with all of his exes,
And all that shit,
Which is just delusional,
Let’s be honest.
So Merriam-Webster defines soulmate as
[1] a close friend who completely understands you
[2] a person who has the same beliefs and opinions as another person.
For me,
That doesn’t clear things up.
Do they need to have all the same opinions,
Or just the big ones,
Like believing in god or not
Or if they want children?
And in the end,
I think it’s all about perception.
You could talk to a million people
And get a million different answers.
However,
I feel that it goes against the fundamental understanding of the word
To insist that there are hundreds, thousands, even,
For everyone.
The term can be traced back to Plato in 385-380 BCE
When he tells a story about
People having two faces,
And four arms, and four legs,
And Zeus becoming jealous
And splitting them in half with a thunderbolt
So that now everyone must spend their lives
Searching for their other half.
Thanks, Zeus.
But the general idea of the term
Is finding someone
That completes you in some way.
Close friends,
And lovers,
And soulmates are all different ideas,
And maybe it’s when we combine them
That we find what we’re looking for.
